My son is a senior in high school at CATE a boarding school in Carpinteria, a little sleepy beach town 20 min south of Santa Barbara. We are in the throws of the college application process, early apps are due November 1, he is doing the last of the last so we can press “submit”. So everything was going smooth until we get to the “disciplinary history” prompt.
Yes. My sweet angel has to answer this question. I feel bad for him, but at the same time, I’m happy that he made a poor decision at 17 as opposed to 37. I think about in this competitive college admission game how will admissions evaluate him. He is a good student, that could be stellar if he worked a little harder and a talented artist. So I know at the end of this process there will be a school for him.
So as he is struggling trying to come up with an explanation for his actions, I think about how do you explain a wrong doing? Should you be apologetic? Or matter of fact? Or just tell the story? As a mom, always trying the find the good in everything, I rationalize to myself that at least it was not stealing or cheating, just a little recreational drinking. Basically while my son was in Italy in the school year abroad program he had a drinking situation one evening and got caught. The drinking was bad enough, complicated by sneaking out and over sleeping the next morning so hence the call to us and the “disciplinary action”. Italy is very liberal when it comes to drinking, so I guess my son decided “when in Rome…”. All is well now, I know he has grown from that experience and the mere fact that he now has to explain it on his college app is a reminder to think about what you are doing.
When I look back at my high school years some 30 + years ago, nothing was different- kids were drinking and doing all sorts of things, my crew was really careful and never got caught or perhaps we/they were lucky ; ).